Deadly Crazy

“Not like this.”

He curled the left side of his lips just a little higher.

“Like that.”

Slamming his hands onto the counter, he groaned as the smile he thought he perfected crumbled into a frown. “Shit. I look like an idiot.” He blew out a breath. “You can do this. Just ask her out. No big deal. Tell her she’s beautiful. Then ask her out.”

Nodding, he watched as his head bobbed up and down in the mirror, just confirming how much of an idiot he was. He was talking to himself in his friend’s bathroom. How much dumber could he get? A lot. He knew that.

He was never good with the ladies. Never. Hell, he never made it to prom because he broke out into hives when he tried to ask Stephanie, the homecoming queen, to the dance. Only a nerd who wore braces would try to ask out the homecoming queen.

He was an adult now. A grown-ass man. Asking out a woman shouldn’t be difficult. Except, she wasn’t just any woman. She was the perfect woman. And totally out of his league.

He jumped as a loud round of banging occurred on the door. “Dude, what are you doing? Taking a dump?”

Sauer whipped open the door and tried to give Newman the best glare he could.

“You’re all red in the face. You all right, man? Push a little too hard?” Newman chuckled. Sauer stepped out of his way. “Crack a smile. I was only kidding.” His bushy eyebrows dipped. “Seriously, you okay?”

“I’m fine. It’s hot in here.”

Newman’s eyes sparkled with humor. “Yeah, Zoe has the heat up ridiculously high. It’s cold as shit outside and she’s afraid that Zabrina will get cold.” He frowned. “You sure you’re okay? You’ve been acting a little funny all day.”

“I’m fine. Go take a piss already.” Sauer laughed to ease the tension coursing through his veins and turned around. The bathroom door shut behind him. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath, then took a step forward, colliding into something warm and soft. He opened his eyes and cursed himself inside. “So sorry, Dee.”

“No problemo. I wasn’t watching where I was going either.” Her sweet laughter filled his heart—and nerves—with joy. Her bright-red hair was curly as usual, little wisps of curls framing her face. He had the urge to swipe a few locks back. Not that he’d do it. But he fantasized about it way too often.

“Beautiful.”

Her brow rose. “What?”

Holy shit. Did he just mutter the word beautiful and nothing else? Now she was looking at him like he was an idiot. “The hallway.” God, could it get much worse?

She laughed, the sound filling up the so-called beautiful hallway. He didn’t even care how dumb he appeared. He loved hearing her laugh. “You’re hilarious, Sauer.”

Chuckling, he ran a hand through his hair, then across the front of his jeans. “Would dance out dinner you…me?” Shit. It just got worse. So much worse. His words didn’t even make sense.

Her face crinkled with confusion as she scrunched her hair a little. “Did you just ask me out?”

“Uh…” How should he answer that? Because he wasn’t sure how to interpret her confusion. “It kind of sounded like it.” He smiled. Not to the perfection he practiced in the mirror, but close enough. And he actually spoke with words connecting in a fluid sentence. He could pat himself on the back.

“You’re so adorable.” She chuckled, patted his shoulder, and walked past him.

Adorable? Well, that was better than her calling him an idiot. But she never answered his question. Why did she just walk away?

He jumped as a hand touched his shoulder. Newman’s face beamed with laughter. “I’m damn proud of you for trying. It’s the effort that counts. Although, a little surprised. Dee’s not really your type. You’re generally quiet and shy. She’s loud and obnoxious. I thought you got over this little crush you had.”

His lips thinned into a tight line. “She’s beautiful.”

“She also didn’t answer your question. Better go clarify, if you can manage to do that again.” His partner laughed as he walked away.

Ask her out again? He didn’t even ask her properly the first time. Forget it. There’s no way he could ask her again and look like even more of a fool.

He followed Newman to the living room where Zeke, Ben, and a few other guys from the precinct were crowded around the TV. He enjoyed football like any other guy, but tonight, the Super Bowl held little appeal. He felt like that even before he tried to ask out Dee. His heart just wasn’t into watching the game.

Plopping down next to Zeke, he attempted to act interested in the game, while trying to figure out how he could leave and make it seem like he wasn’t escaping. Newman was the only one who knew he had tried to ask out Dee and failed miserably. He still felt the need to escape. What would he say when she came out of the kitchen? That’s if the women decided to join them in the living room to watch the game. If they stayed there all night, then maybe he could handle staying.

Newman, who sat in a recliner near the left side of the couch, started to speak in a low tone. “Guess who tried to ask out Dee?”

His head slowly rotated. The intense glare on his face was enough to tell Newman that he didn’t appreciate him acting like a dick. What kind of friend would throw him under the bus like that?

“Davies from Narcotics did. Totally got shut down in under two seconds. I do believe her exact words were, ‘Yeah, not gonna happen in a million years.’ Then she walked away.” Zeke shook his head as he laughed. “Davies couldn’t handle Dee. She needs a man who can put her in her place. She never holds back what she’s thinking.”

“You’re going to go back on the douche list of hers if you don’t keep your voice down, man,” Ben said with a snicker. “And I know how much you hate being on that list.”

A man who could put her in her place? Well, shit, he wasn’t that kind of guy. The few relationships he had he never acted that way with a woman. Hell, he never even argued much with a woman.

Dee shouldn’t have to be put in her place. Sure, sometimes she spoke without thinking, but he liked that about her—that she didn’t give a shit what other people thought. He almost wished he could be like that. He was honest. He didn’t lie when asked a direct question or if someone wanted his honest opinion, but he didn’t blurt things out like she tended to do.

“Na. Not Davies.”

All eyes turned to Newman, waiting for him to elaborate. Except him. He refused to look at Newman. He still couldn’t believe Newman was embarrassing him like this. What was the point? To have a good laugh? Newman had never treated him like this before. Why now?

Some found it odd he could handle a criminal with ease. Some even laughed at him, as if it were a strange mystery they couldn’t figure out. Put a murderer in front of him, or someone who committed a terrible crime, and he showed them who was boss. Nothing about those encounters made him hesitate. Any other situation, like the current one he was in, he resorted to his usual shy, quiet, reserved self. It’s just the way it was.

Maybe it had to do with bullies. All through middle and high school, he was bullied. Awkward scrawny kid. Braces. Acne. He was an easy target. Most times, the kids got away with it. He didn’t tattle on them. He didn’t say anything to his parents. It all stayed locked away inside. Sort of like now.

When it came time for college, he moved away. Far, far away. He wanted a fresh start. He started to work out more. He became more confident, more secure. Then, someone tried to bully him—by robbing him. It was like a light switch. Off to on in a blink of an eye. He sucker-punched the guy and then called the police. Yeah, it was probably one of the dumbest things he ever did, but it felt so empowering to finally show one bully they couldn’t push him around anymore.

He became a cop soon after. Criminals became bullies. He needed to keep the world safe from these bullies. Now his partner was acting like a bully. Why was he letting Newman act this way? Screw that!

“It was me.” All eyes turned to him. “Do you feel better, Newman? Are you having a good laugh making me look like an idiot?” He stood up.

“Ah, shit, Sauer. I didn’t mean—”

“Then maybe next time you should keep your damn mouth shut.” He started to walk around the couch to the front door.

“Yo, Sauer, where are you going, man?” Zeke asked, the concern evident in his voice. “I kinda figured it was you. I was hoping Newman would let it drop when I said Davies. It’s a little obvious you like her. It’s just…”

Sauer turned toward him, his fists clenching and unclenching. It’s just. Yeah, he heard that a lot. It’s just, she’s not right for you. It’s just, you’re so shy. It’s just, you’re different and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just. He hated hearing that.

“It’s just, what? I couldn’t handle a woman like her? I don’t deserve a woman like her? Tell me. Or better yet, why don’t you all mind your own damn business, especially you, Newman.”

He grabbed his jacket from the closet, stalked to the door in three long strides, slamming it on his way out. Maybe he was acting like a jerk, or even like a baby, but screw them. He wasn’t going to be bullied by his friends. Call him sensitive. Call him whatever. He didn’t care at the moment.

* * *

A door slammed.

“Geez, please tell me those men aren’t getting all pissy because the game isn’t going the way they want. The Vikings didn’t even make the playoffs this year. Why do they get so hot about the game?” Dee rolled her eyes, primping her hair a little.

“You know them. They do get a little heated when the game goes sour. I hope nobody got called to work.” Zoe frowned. “Well, at least I know it wasn’t Zeke because he’d say good-bye before slamming his way out of the house.”

“Or Ben. Maybe one of the other guys had to leave,” Rina added softly.

“I thought Chrissy would’ve been here with Newman. I kind of like her. Although, she’s weird sometimes.”

Zoe almost spit out the sip of wine she had taken. “What is so weird about her, Dee?”

She shrugged. “She never wears any clothes that show cleavage. Flaunt what God gave you, honey.”

Rina chuckled softly. “Some people are shy.”

Like Sauer. Dee always found his quietness so endearing. He always had a way of looking at her as if he could see straight to her heart. When she let it, anyway. It wouldn’t do good to let those looks affect her.

Or his sweet words. He surprised the hell out of her when he attempted to ask her out. Oh, it had been the cutest thing she ever experienced. No one, not one man, had ever been as charming as Sauer trying to ask her out.

She didn’t even answer him properly. There was no way she could shut him down with a simple no. Sauer was different. He didn’t deserve a quick no. And she didn’t deserve to say yes. That left her in an impossible situation. She had almost floundered with her words.

“Everything okay, Zeke?” Zoe wrapped her arms around him as he walked up to her. “Who left?”

“Sauer.”

“Why? Did he get suckered into working while all of you enjoy the rest of the game?” Dee cocked a brow. She wouldn’t put it past all of them to make Sauer handle it while they had fun. That’s just what they did to him sometimes. He was easily manipulated that way. He never argued.

Zeke refused to look at her. “No. He just left.”

“He slammed the door like he was pissed. He’s always a happy guy.”

He still refused to look at her. “Newman might’ve been giving him shit about something and he didn’t appreciate it.”

Well, it wasn’t hard to figure out what that meant. Newman must’ve heard Sauer ask her out.

“Now you think I’m a bitch.”

Finally, his eyes whipped to her.

Rina softly gasped. “Why would you say that, Dee?”

Zeke pursed his lips into a frown. “What did you say to him?”

Zoe glanced between her and Zeke, her brows dipped in obvious confusion.

“What’s it to you?”

A throat cleared. “Would you two care to clarify what you’re talking about? Obviously, you’re talking about Sauer.” Zoe continued to glance back and forth.

She started to fiddle with the bottom of her wine glass. “I accidently bumped into him in the hallway and he—”

“Asked you out,” Rina softly finished.

Dee glanced at her. “He’s a sweet guy. It surprised me.”

“I think you should go out with him. He’s a great guy. And you’d finally have a sexy detective like we have.” Rina smiled brightly.

Zeke laughed, giving her a wink. “I think he’s liked you for a while, Dee. He’s a little too shy for you, though.”

She pierced him with a hard stare. “Hey, Zeke, mind your own damn business. Maybe you should apologize to him. Whatever was said, he didn’t leave here happy.”

“Okay, let’s all calm down. Go watch football.” Zoe started to push Zeke out of the kitchen. “Did you come in here for another beer?”

“He came in here to see what I said to Sauer.” Her brow lifted again. “I can tell you I didn’t say anything to make him leave like he did.”

“But you turned him down?”

She cocked a brow as she threw a hand to her hip. “I repeat. None. Of. Your. Damn. Business.” Shaking her head, she glanced between Rina and Zoe. “I think I’m gonna go, too.”

“Dee, don’t leave.” Zoe lightly slapped Zeke’s chest. “See what you guys did.”

“I…we…” Zeke mumbled as Dee grabbed her purse from the kitchen counter.

“Don’t worry about it. My feelings aren’t hurt, but Sauer deserves an apology.”

Rina said good-bye as Zoe protested again, but Dee had enough. She enjoyed the sweet way Sauer asked her out. And the guys, acting like a bunch of douches, were ruining it. She walked out of the kitchen, grabbed her jacket from the closet, then stopped at the front door, swiveling her gaze to the living room. All eyes turned her way.

She stared hard at all of them, producing a small smirk as they started to squirm in their seats, especially Newman. No words were necessary. They understood what she was saying just by that simple look.

Swinging open the door, she slammed it as hard as Sauer had, just because. She wanted them to know whose side she was on. Even though she didn’t say yes, she was still on Sauer’s side. Always. No matter what. He was a sweet guy.

Ten minutes later, she pulled into her driveway. As always, she was glad she didn’t live too far from Zeke and Zoe’s house. Before Zoe married Zeke, she lived much farther away. She liked not having to drive thirty minutes, especially when she was irritated. A shot of whiskey was calling her name. Numb the pain a little.

Slamming her car door, still peeved, she marched to her front door. Her steps slowed as she neared it. A red rose lay on the mat in front of the door, a white card next to it.

Really? She was so not a flower kind of girl.

Picking up the card, her brow rose.

I’m sorry.

Sauer? Did he swing by her house to say sorry for asking her out?

No. That didn’t seem like his style. He was way too shy to do something like that. He also didn’t know where she lived. He had never been to her house before.

Ugh, her neighbor. Mathias. He was the worst pest ever.

He had been asking her out since he moved in five months ago. She enjoyed men. A lot. But one thing she never did was date someone who lived in her neighborhood. Talk about awkward when it didn’t work out. Which it wouldn’t because she didn’t do relationships. Not the long-term kind. Another reason she turned down Sauer. Sort of. Maybe she should’ve said no in a nice way. Was she leading him on right now without a clear answer? Probably.

What a bitch. Well, at least she earned the title honestly.

She crumbled the note as she swiped the flower up. Stalking to the garbage can on the side of the house, she tossed the note and flower inside. Now she had to have a conversation with Mathias. Again. The guy never stopped with his antics.

Just last week his dog came into her yard and took a shit right on her walkway that led from the door to the driveway. She nearly fell trying to avoid it. She knew the dog was well-trained and listened to Mathias without fail. Which meant Mathias purposely let him shit on her property. He was obviously a guy who didn’t like to hear the word no.

She knew he let his dog do it so he’d have a reason to talk to her. What a dumb reason. All it did was piss her off even more. Now he thought a dumb rose and a simple note would make it all better. Not!

Forget it. She wouldn’t say anything to him. That’s probably what he wanted her to do. Not going to happen. If it got much worse, she’d have no problem siccing Zeke and Ben on him. Even though she didn’t get along with them all the time—Zeke mostly—they’d still do anything for her. That’s just the nice guys they were. It probably helped she was best friends with their wives as well.

She slammed her front door, still in a pissy mood, not even sure it would dwindle down any time soon. Disabling her alarm, she re-armed it and locked the door.

A loud thump echoed around the kitchen as she slammed a shot glass onto the counter. Bending low, she pulled out the bottle of whiskey she had hidden in the bottom cupboard way in the back. She hid it for a reason. If it was visible all the time, she’d down it way too fast. She didn’t have a drinking problem, but when irritation hit her, which happened more and more often, she needed a shot to chase the mood away. One shot normally did the trick. Sometimes, it required two. And only if she was really, really pissed.

Two shots it would be tonight.

She’d like to say it was because the guys gave Sauer a hard time. It was more like she felt horrible for denying him. She was damaged. Unworthy of a man as sweet and good as him.

What in the world did he see in her, anyway? She never attracted the good guys. Her aim was always the slightly bad guys with sex on their mind. She might complain to Zoe and Rina she wanted what they had, but she knew she’d never have it. She wasn’t dumb enough to believe she could have something as good as they did.

The warm liquid slid down her throat. She cringed from the burn, then filled up the shot glass again. Without thinking, she drank that one just as fast.

Besides slamming back shots, one other thing simmered her down.

Sex. Hot, dirty sex.

She only wanted that with one guy right now. One guy she shouldn’t even think about.

Sauer.

***

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